


Temptations of the Flesh

by Very_Impractical_Girl



Category: Faith (Airdorf Video Game)
Genre: Catholic Guilt, Filthy, Masturbation, Mild Hallucination, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Orgasm, Other, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Religious Guilt, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Sexual Relief, Sexual Repression, Shame, delusion of demonic possession, poor bby, scrupulosity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-27
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-13 11:48:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29650869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Very_Impractical_Girl/pseuds/Very_Impractical_Girl
Summary: John sins.Hi, local touch-starved priest jacks off, not much more to say here. Haaaaaaaah wow, don't read this. Unless you're a John fangirl like me I guess? Slightly deals with themes of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and self-hatred I guess. Also a shitty drawing I made at the end!This poor man. You can jack off, I promise.





	Temptations of the Flesh

**Author's Note:**

> Slightly inspired by [this picture](https://twitter.com/heck_yeaaauuh/status/1296336871027388416).  
> Things you should know about my headcanon John; He's pretty much the same, I see him in his late 20s with a bit of chin stubble bc idk that's cute. He's a shy and nervous boi. Also Karen is just an ex instead of ex-wife bc ouch I feel bad for him. And he has like, really bad insomnia.

John placed the book back on his shelf and then glanced around.

He sighed in annoyance. There was really nothing to do in his bare house. He had a TV sure, but he never watched anything really, besides the news. What he really wanted to do was just sleep, but he always had issues with falling and staying asleep. He considered writing in his journal but about what? It was a largely uneventful day. 

There wasn't even anything for him to clean. Living alone he was generally pretty tidy and didn't let things get out of place. He really wanted to just go to his bedroom but felt nervous doing so.

Walking over to the side of his hallway he tried to think about anything, anything but the growing want inside of him.

He performed the sign of the cross repeatedly over his chest, but it no matter how many times he did the motion it just didn't feel 'right'. 

Shaking his head, he was at least glad to be at home. He knew he probably looked ridiculous standing frozen in place, constantly repeating the same action. But stepping into his bedroom without perfecting it gave him anxiety. Utter dread that something awful would come as a result, despite knowing that logically it meant no sense. After a few more tries, it felt right enough for him to be able to walk into his bedroom. He shuffled around in unease, there was another bad feeling growing within him. Strong sexual desire.

The urge had suddenly come to him maybe two weeks ago. He had fought it off for quite a while but it was getting even more difficult to ignore. The past few nights had been sleepless ones, he was quite used to his insomnia but his tired mind wasn't helping. He was scared to even lay down at this point, fearing just that simple act could make him want it more. Clasping his head he tried to ignore the stiffened member buried in his pants. The heat was getting unbearable, and he felt his cock react to just pressing against the fabric. Begging to be let out. 

"No, stop.." he murmured aloud, to no one in particular. "Leave me alone..." 

The situation was just confusing at best. 

He scarcely watched TV and never, ever, looked at the degeneracy that was porn. Why was he having these feelings?? He glanced around his incredibly bare room as if looking for something that was out of place. This surely had to be the work of a demon. Some vile entity had followed him home to curse him with these sexual urges. There was no other explanation he could think of. He looked down his hall in fear, but saw nothing. 

_Fight it, John._

That was the only thing he could think to tell himself.

Heading back over to his desk, he picked up his crucifix again and twirled it in his hand seeking some kind of strength, but he didn't feel anything from it. This worried him. 

_It really has been ages, why can't I just..._

No. How could he even _think_ that? He couldn't have thought it, could he? Demon. Some demon was placing words in his head now. Panicking, he held the cross out in front of himself despite nothing being there. Nothing at all. Frowning, he set the cross down on his bed before turning around again and taking a breath.

The priest tried to untense his body but still found he was immensely uncomfortable. Ruffling his hair, he tried to ignore the pressing heat, but it was almost painful. The pressure was probably making things worse right? His stiffness might go away if it wasn't trapped within the fabric, at least he hoped that would be the case. 

Despite his initial hesitation, he undid his pants, exposing his entire crotch.

He sighed in relief, that already felt so much better. Still... He opened an eye and glanced down at his hardened cock, which was fully sticking up at attention.

"Ughhh..." He felt absolutely filthy. 

It wasn't anything special, but definitely bigger when erect. It swayed a bit, seemingly on his own and he looked away embarrassed. 

There was something else he noticed. His breathing. His chest felt so incredibly _heavy,_ the small shallow breaths he'd been taking made his chest rise and fall at sporadic intervals. So heavily filled with desperation. The urge was absolutely unbearable, every part of his body felt tight with tension, and his face consistently felt warm. Tears welled up in his eyes, not understanding why this was happening to him. He'd been good hadn't he? 

The constant insomnia wasn't helping his mind any. He just wanted a night's rest. Why was it so hard for him to fall asleep nowadays? He finally acknowledged that his body felt absolutely weak. If he went through with this, he knew it would knock him out. He could finally rest. But that reasoning wasn't enough for him. What, he should sin so he could rest? 

As he stood there fighting within himself, his arm lowered seemingly on it's own. Was he possessed now? 

"Ahhh..." he gasped, as he gave his throbbing member a quick single stroke. Something like fire prickled through him. The devils fire surely. 

Blush completely filled his face. _Fuck._ He wanted it again. Just once more.

Something like a muffled grunt came from his throat as he repeated the motion. The priests fingers grazed his sensitive tip which was leaking fluid, the precum slightly trailing his hand. Pleasure surged through him, along with slight relief. It was a relief he hated. 

_Fight it, John._

He was trying. But he really couldn't. His body just craved it even more now

Even worse was his head felt utterly blank as he tried to search his mind for any type of Bible passage he could recite to fight off these thoughts. Why wasn't anything coming to mind? He had memorized tons. Was he completely losing it? Then he noticed something else.

The crucifix. He had picked it up again and was still holding it in his opposite hand.  
Whilst he was doing this.

He wanted to scream.

John's grip on it tightened. Tightened until the sides of it were digging into his palm. Tears streamed down his face as he hoped the pain would be stronger than the pleasure. Maybe if he were in enough pain he'd simply pass out. He grimaced as the points pressed against his tendons in an unnatural manner and held it there as long as he could. It hurt like hell. Finally, his body refused to endure the pain any longer.

His hand opened and the crucifix fell to the floor. 

_Failure. Fucking failure you are._

An inaudible whimper weakly came from his throat. 

_You've already touched it. You're already stained with filth. Might as well finish._

Even though he still hated this, that thought was somewhat freeing. His body felt as if it was no longer under his control, all he could think of was to just satisfy himself. He would ask for penance tomorrow. 

Ignoring the pain in his one palm he unbuttoned his shirt, and weakly tried to slide it off his shoulders, but failed. He was so tired, he decided to just leave it on; he was guiltily eager to start working himself. Lowering his hand he gave his cock a few gentle strokes, before lightly taking it in both. 

His hips thrusted forwards, seemingly on their own. Sucking in another breath of air, he slightly tightened his grip, making him thrust a bit more forcefully and hissed in delight. _Fucking amazing._ Whilst continuing he briefly imagined that he was giving his love to a woman, which was what God intended after all. It made him moan softy, the idea of having someone, but then he scoffed at the thought. _Yeah, like that'd ever happen._ Hot warmth sent a shiver up his body.

"Oh, fuck..."

John turned around, mortified. Did _HE_ just say that? His exhausted mind had warped it, making it sound inhuman. He briefly wondered if he were sprouting horns. The room felt as if it was swaying and it made him take notice of his exhaustion. He wanted to lay down now. 

"Mmmff." 

After completely taking off his pants and boxers he stumbled and then flopped down lazily onto his small bed. Pausing for a second, he stared up at his ceiling taking note of how nice it was to sink into the soft mattress. He remained still until his member twitched again reminding him of his want. _Just go through with it now._ He told himself still with some reluctance. Giving a slight glance down, he stared at his upright rod.

Geez. He was hard as a rock. More fluid leaked from his tip, making him shiver a bit. John put a hand over his face in embarrassed astonishment, wondering if his cock would be considered impressive by worldly standards. He certainly _felt_ big. 

He gently took himself in his hand and began stroking his entire length, which filled him with utter bliss. Keeping his pace, he let himself enjoy it just for the time being. Even though there was still guilt in the back of his mind, it was far less noticeable than the sweet elation radiating from his crotch. 

Something like a growl came from him as his body demanded more, and he didn't hesitate in going faster. That, along with the... _sounds_ of his repeated motions filled the previously silent room making him want to hide in embarrassment.

That sweet buildup was growing in his chest, and the excitement brought a rough grunt from his throat. He was close.

He slightly made himself slow down at this. This was so good he didn't want it to be over so soon... he drew back his hand and paused as he felt the buildup retreat. _Look at you. You like this._ There was no reason in arguing with himself. Yes, he did. After giving himself a brief rest, he began again, letting himself indulge in how good it felt. His own little paradise. Sinful, but one of the greatest sensations he knew. 

His arm was beginning to tire, but he continued stroking. He was incredibly close, and as much as he wanted to edge a bit more, he either didn't have any more willpower or strength to continue.

"O-Oh, _please..._ " He rasped, not knowing who the hell he was speaking to. Keeping his moans in was just getting difficult. "I...Ah, I-" _Fuck._ His chest was getting tight.

He put a hand over his mouth, wanting to keep quiet as he reached his peak. As if not moaning would somehow make his act less sinful. _Filthy sinner._ Preparing himself, he kept going and didn't stop.

_Closer. Closer. Closer still._

Until something like a bomb went off inside him.

_Oh fuck yes._

His orgasm was so strong that his hand barely helped to muffle his cry. Something like a rough yet piercing shriek erupted from his throat, and he was actually grateful he was alone. He sounded like some kind of injured animal. His back arched intensely, a shot of his cum just narrowly missing his head. 

The rest of it landed on his shirt and bare chest but he hardly noticed as the pure ecstasy sent him out of it. He couldn't keep from moaning in utter delight as the final remnants of his load were released, the rest of the world seeming secondary in comparison to the sheer bliss overtaking his body. His head was spinning. 

If there were one good thing about his celibacy it was that his orgasm lasted much longer than most men's, getting several more intense shockwaves long after ejaculation. He rode out the remainder of his immensely fucking satisfied. Despite the fact that a tear had fallen from his eye, it still felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

As he finally came back down to Earth, the shame crept up again. He was completely exhausted, but still felt he had to repent.

"..F...Forgive me Father...please..." 

That was all he could muster for now, as his chest still rose and fell.

Oddly enough though, he felt ok. 

He could hardly keep his eyes open anymore. His afterglow was lulling him to sleep, and he gratefully accepted it. 

John fell into a peaceful and dreamless slumber.


End file.
